Frolicking Imp

Frolicking Imp danced around the fair damsel, singing happily about his deep love for her.
Unexpectedly, she frowned.
"I am very sorry, Imp, but my heart belongs to Sir James The Golden," she said.
Then she kicked the imp and he died.

Friendly Devil

Suddenly, eyes seemed to move on the cavern wall.
As he moved the torch closer, he realized there was a face etched in the stone.
It was hideous, and it was alive.
"Welcome!" it said in a sinister voice.

Envy

Envy wanted to know more about his neighbor Mr.Jones so he could hate him all the more.
Jones had way too much, thought Envy.
Not like him, he never had enough.
And Mrs.Jones was such a cute redhead...

Teddy the Third Class Demon

Teddy hated to be called a greenhorn by all the other demons.
He couldn't wait to be all purple and crimson and fiery.
Meantime he had to do all the chores, stoke the fires, and wait patiently for a spot to open up so he could get ahead.
Unfortunately, none of the higher ups ever seemed to die down here in Hades.

Bug

When Bug invaded the house, looking to bite flesh and to suck blood, no one thought it was a big deal.
A quick hit with a fly swatter would do the trick, they thought.
But Bug was extraterrestrial, and he soon grew exponentially bigger.
And hungrier...

Bad Thought

Bad Thought had always been a pessimist.
He always had a lot of dark ideas floating around his head.
Then one day he was hit in the face by a pepperoni pizza.
In all his musings, Dark Thought had never contemplated such a dire circumstance.
On the other hand, it sure tasted good.

Baby Thunderbird

When he was born, Baby Thunderbird was fed pre-digested morsels by his Mom until he could fend for himself.
When he grew big enough, he ate his Mom.
She really didn't see it coming, either.
It's like that in some households.

All you need is the Love Monster

Are you truly happy with your life?
Or do you feel you have become just another mindless consumer of electronic goods?
Hooked on the cell phone and the iPod, desperate to receive an email but never sending any?
All you need is the Love Monster.

Druidorr

Druidorr thinks his are the sexiest tentacles in Alpha Centauri.
They are smooth and silky.
And they are agreeable wavey in anti-gravity zones.
Maybe he should dye them blonde?

Bertrand

Bertrand always feels a bit dopey.
And a bit shy and intimidated.
He wonders why he wasn't born knowing everything like other people.
Boy, how they lord it over him!

The Waiter at the Vampire Club

The Waiter at the Vampire Club wants a tip.
Quit checking your wallet.
Don't look in the pockets of your overcoat.
Small change won't do.

Bastet

The ancient Egyptians worshiped many strange deities, known collectively as the "Pantheon".
Among them was Bastet, protector of the pharaoh.
She was a solar goddess, depicted sometimes as a lioness, or a house cat.
Other times she would be depicted as a cat-bodied hot mama.

The Black Magician

The Black Magician was never good with explosives.
Once he tried putting some gun powder on his fingertips so that when he snapped his fingers, there would be a momentary burst of light and a puff of smoke, allowing him to mysteriously disappear at the end of his act.
Naturally, he miscalculated the amount of powder required.
Ultimately, the workers compensation board refused to accept his application for a work-related mishap, citing gross negligence, the damage that had been done to his employer's premises, as well as the few fatalities in the audience.

Under the Blanket

Under the Blanket might be a purse filled with gold.
Or a malediction that might steal your soul.
Or a magical genie that might make you all your wishes come true.
Or a stinky monster that hasn't bathed in a month.

Going Back to the Sea

It was a really swell party.
It was a really nice summer day and a lot of good wine flowed.
It started with someone horsing around with a pretty girl, and eventually someone got thrown in the swimming pool.
It was a really big swimming pool.
Then a lot of people started jumping into that pool.
With their party dresses on and all.
Meanwhile, one of the guests slinked away and went back to the sea.

The Hound of Hell

It's been a while since we discussed pointy teeth at monsteraday.com...
Even though we are, in fact, the world renowned experts on the subject.
You could say, "Pointy Teeth'R'Us".
Therefore, we are proud to present a new monster to you today, the Hound of Hell.
He is a case in point.

The zombie who lost his car keys

The zombie who lost his car keys was not very proud of himself.
Now he was locked out of his car.
And he was going to have to stumble all the way home, ten kilometers away.
"Brains!" he exclaimed. "I need more brains!"

Green Bird

Green Bird, the last of his kind, was hidden up above in the dense foliage of the jungle.
He watched the weary explorers below hack their way through the dense underbrush with machetes.
Slowly the scientific expedition bore on in the stifling humidity, in the quest to find new species of fauna.
Unfortunately, they were all too busy talking on their cell phones so they never spotted Green Bird.

Broccoli Monster

This monster wants all the little kids to eat broccoli, and at every meal.
Broccoli cereal for breakfast.
Crunchy broccoli and ranch dip for lunch.
Broccoli soup for supper.
Broccoli is good for you, insists the Broccoli Monster.
You parents must eat some as well, show the good example to the wee ones.
Swallow it! More! Swallow it I say!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Animal Guy

Animal Guy was a wise and ancient monster who believed in reincarnation.
In fact, occasionally when he slept he would remember a past life in a dream.
Once he had been a cricket, which had been swallowed by a toad.
Obce he had been an inert rock, rolling down a hill and splashing the pond, chasing away the toads.
Once he had been a sexy slave girl too, who was eventually stoned to death in public for chewing gum at the King's funeral.
And so on, and so forth.

The Playful Ex-President

"Ha, ha, ha, kids! Come sit on my lap and I will tell you wonderful stories of democracy," said the Playful Ex-President who had just risen from the grave.
"In my time we had a carrot and a stick, and occasionally some mortar fire and bayonets to convince other folks about the free and equal practice of political self-determination."
The Ex-President paused a moment to take a bite of flesh from the arm of a screaming little one.
"Yum, yum! Freedom flesh!"

Zombinsky

Zombinsky heatedly promotes a non-hierarchical, non-bureaucratic, stateless society without private property in the means of production.
Once private property is abolished, individuals are no longer deprived of access to means of production so they can freely associate themselves (without social constraint) to produce and reproduce their own conditions of existence and fulfill their needs and desires.
This would bring about an end to class society, i.e. there would be no more owners neither proletarians.
No more keeping up with the Joneses.

Dark Bunny

Dark Bunny hates chocolate.
He doesn't like eggs either, bleaah!
He is repelled by colorful things, like Easter eggs.
Dark Bunny likes really fast heavy metal bands, wearing black T-shirts and a baseball cap worn the wrong way.
It takes all kinds.

The cabinet of Doctor Deth

In the cabinet of Doctor Deth, no one ever suffers...
For long, that is.
He will rid you of pain and worries.
And you'll never complain about his bill, either.

Ignatieff

Ignatieff is a sinister monster with bushy eyebrows and antennas sticking out.
He wants us to like him.
He wants us to trust him.
And then what?

Zapster

Have you ever stuck a fork in an electrical socket when you were young?
We the are artists at monsteraday.com have done so many, many times.
Another way to experience this somewhat educational experience is to meet Zapster the monster.
He gives "shock and awe" a new meaning.

Paco the Monster

-- "Hola Paco el monstruo, ¿cómo estás?"
-- "Bueno, ¿y usted?"
-- "Me siento muy bien!"
-- "No por mucho tiempo, porque me voy a comer. Miam miam."

The Fast-forward Fish

The Fast-forward Fish is evolving millions of years in just a few days.
Its brain is growing bigger every day.
Soon it will develop opposable thumbs.
It has begun to reason and simple mathematics are within its grasp.
Soon it will start a blog section on the monsteraday web site...

Blue Lion

Blue Lion is a monster that lives on an ice planet far, far away.
His world is larger than Earth, and so the gravity is higher.
The temperature never reaches above minus 100 degrees Celsius.
And there is never anything good to watch on his cable TV.

Pensive Devil

Pensive Devil has always dreamed of going water skiing.
But he is afraid he will look ridiculous in swimming trunks.
"Oh, how glorious it would be to glide on the waves," he daydreams.
"Pulled by a speedboat driven by Lucifera!"