Tulpa

Tulpa and his assistant Chang are in charge of leading your soul to its proper place in the afterlife.
They got the job from this creepy burnt out Skeleton Dude with a scythe.
The Skeleton Guy was depressive and had taken to drinking.
He was often late on the job and had become unreliable.
Finally, management upstairs got fed up.
When the Skeleton Guy was sacked, Tulpa got his row boat and everything.

The Telepathic Preacher

The Telepathic Preacher is very efficient at confession time.
You can't get away with a thing.
You'll walk in thinking maybe all you will confess about was that rowdy office X-Mas party.
But you'll walk out after admitting every little thing ever!
Boy, talk about Hail Marys...
I still have 13,456 left to recite!

Sphynx

The living Sphynx floated in the strange ether of the nether world, watching the pyramids being built by the ancient Egyptians in his mirror between worlds.
"I don't understand why you are interested in these ants," declared Anubis.
"I find them fascinating," replied the Sphynx. "One day I might even go there for a day trip."
Little did he know of the petrification effect.

Pumpkin Face

Pumpkin Face is a monster who rides a Harley Davidson motorcycle.
He has snake tattoos and a dangerous looking leer.
He is rarely shaved and he belches often.
I know him well, because he is in my prayer circle on Sunday afternoons.
He's actually quite nice.

Lucius

Lucius is a monster who feels unloved and unwanted.
Once, he had a special someone.
But she changed, and he changed, and they slowly grew apart.
Now she is gone.
Still, she lingers in his heart...

Spinning Top Head

As it rolled down the stairs of Freedom...
And bounced into Freedom hall...
And was ushered in to talk to the Freedom Council...
It occurred to the Spinning Top Head it was time his kind became a little more creative at least in finding new names.

Rasta Zombie

I be Rasta Zombie, man.
A raft full of zombies from Haiti landed in Jamaica and now I be dead.
Jah no with me no more but I still rocksteady to reggae, man.
Peace to yo!
And brains.

Zeta

"The solution is simple," said Zeta the supreme master of planet Galax-orr.
"Body checking from behind and high sticking must be banned from hockey!"
"There are simply too many concussions and head injuries among the players!"
All his loyal subjects quickly agreed, even though they had no idea what he was talking about.

Chameleon Boy

Chameleon Boy was a monster who was a daring bank robber.
His many disguises eluded law enforcement for many years.
The police thought for a while that they were chasing an extensive rogue's gallery.
But Chameleon Boy always worked alone on a heist.

In the dream of the monster

In the dream of the monster, he was trapped in the body of another monster in another dimension and he could not speak.
Someone offered him yet another over sized glass full of Hungarian sparkling white wine and a plate full of crackers topped with smoked salmon and cream cheese.
When the monster woke up, the party had died down and the last intoxicated guests were stumbling out into waiting taxis, singing television cartoon themes.
The living room was in shambles and the large screen television was broken.
There were empty bottles everywhere.
The monster held his throbbing head in both hands.
He wondered where his strange dream might have come from.

Metamorphosis of Slobo

The crust around Slobo slowly dried out and he began to stir inside.
Slobo woke up.
He realized he had changed.
And that it was time to leave his cocoon.

I'm not sure, but I think the new kid at school is possessed

I'm not sure, but I think the new kid at school is possessed.
He has bad skin...
His head spins 'round and 'round...
He recites political speeches by Sarah Palin...

The Jerk Monster

The Jerk Monster consists mostly of a puff of smoke.
If you breathe him in, you don't die.
You only get a bad headache.
Just open the window to let some fresh air in and he will soon be gone.

Kate Astrof

Unknowingly to the world, the brilliant but slightly tormented artist for monsteraday.com, Robert, was a bachelor.
In the past, he had had girlfriends, but they had always been of the same pattern.
Which was temperamental, high strung and with frequent emotional meltdowns.
One had an explosive temper.
One of them flung dish plates at Robert's head.
They were all a bit scary in their own way
Despite strong evidence to the contrary, his family sided with Robert and decided it wasn't his fault at all.
Robert's older brother advised him that if this pattern remained unchanged, his next girlfriend might stab him to death.
So Robert sort of decided he was going to stay single for a while.
Then he met Kate Astrof...

Humant

It is a little known fact that the 0 calorie artificial sweetener aspartame kills ants very effectively.
This is the same product you can find in most "no calorie" soda drinks.
Humant did not know about this.
And of course there was no one left after he had wiped out mankind to remind him not to drink that stuff even though it tasted great.
How ironic!

The Human Cricket Chimera

The Human Cricket Chimera was an over-the-top David Bowie fan.
In the 1980s, this monster camped out for five days at Wembley Stadium to buy concert tickets for every show.
When Bowie decided to move away from his "Let's Dance" period, the Human Cricket Chimera decided to remain unconditionally loyal to his idol.
Then, Bowie agreed to star in the movie "Labyrinth" and that changed everything.

The Hippy Ghost

Brent Mydland was the fourth keyboardist to play for the American rock band the Grateful Dead.
He was with the band for eleven years, longer than any other keyboardist.
After his untimely death, he played some great gigs for a while with Jerry and Jimi and Jim.
Then he decided it was time to go solo.

Henchman Clone

It's hard to say who is responsible for the Henchman Clone monster.
The doctors who invented the genetic recipes in their laboratories?
The multinational corporations who marketed the Henchman Clone as an educational baby toy?
Or the political lobbyists who paid for lavish cocktail parties in honor of the ruling party in power, to convince them that the sweeping contagion was actually a good thing?

Green Man

Green Man is Angry about growing older and not having achieved his potential.
No one leaves comments on his blogs.
No one calls.
No one seems to care, really.
They're all too busy downloading crapola.
Green Man slams a fist on his desk.
There is only one thing to do.
Carry on and do another blog post.

Debrained

The Debrained monster was created through childhood television addiction...
Radiating cell phone abuse...
Mind controlling substances added to the food and water...
Not to mention the lack of fresh air and exercice.

Aquarius

Aquarius is a mutant who swims in the Gulf of Mexico.
He breathes in tar balls and exhales water.
This makes him a valuable resource to oil companies who have accidentally spilled oil through gross negligence and uncontrolled cost-cutting.
Unfortunately, there is only one Aquarius and a lot of oil companies.

The Angry Cat King

"Death to the peons!" hissed the angry Cat King.
"They have become a nuisance."
"But the humans also serve a purpose, revered one!" pleaded the High Cat Priest. "For they milk the cows with which we are fed!"
And so, as the High Cat Priest was led away to be executed at the order of the king, he could not help but think a serious management mistake had just been made.

Ancient One

The face of the Ancient One was discovered on a papyrus scroll.
This was the monster who enslaved mankind thousands of years ago and built a powerful and far-reaching kingdom.
He attacked cities with his well-funded armies and one by one they fell.
Sort of like Walmart.

The Wise Dog Man

The Wise Dog Man was a monster who was a famous psychoanalysts.
He could accurately interpret any strange dream a patient of his might have had...
A large key running away, yelling: "It's a secret! It's a secret!"
Finding a clump of hair in a coffee cup.
Being naked in a voting booth with only liberal candidates on the ballot list.

Yeti

Somewhere on the high slopes of the Himalaya mountains, a monster was trodding through the thick snow.
His kind has dwindled to one and now extinction was looming.
He looked up, and a desert of cold met his eyes.
Suddenly, above him there was the rumble of an avalanche...

Ghost Pilot

Ghost Pilot's job was delivering the mail between the planets in his solar system.
Then one day the Union called a strike, and it dragged on.
All the letters just kept accumulating in a big pile.
"There's no more space left where we can pile it up," said a Union boss.
"Let's just dump it into the sun!"

Geneticist's Hobby

On the planet Glomm lived a geneticist who lived on the edge.
This scientist had no fear.
If his instruments indicated they were about to blow up, he just added more amino acids into the vat.
Thus, a monster was born