Rhetorical Rhesus

Rhetorical Rhesus is a young monster that keeps trying to have the last word in any conversation.
He keeps answering anything you say to him with, "Yes, but!"
It's time to eat your supper.
"Yes, but..."
Please do your homework.
"Yes, but..."
Stop talking back or your punishment is going to be dire!
"Yes, but..."

Pang

Pang is a merciless monster with fearsome weapons...
The neuronic whip and the pong balls of doom.
Suddenly, he accidentally drops one of those balls on his foot...
Witness the pain of Pang!

The Leopard Being

The Leopard Being is a hired killer who participated in JFK's assassination.
On his deathbed, he admitted all his misdeeds.
"The Pope and Ronald McDonald paid me to do it," he admitted.
The world is stunned.

The robot that lost its crankiness

The robot that lost its crankiness is a mechanical marvel.
It can walk.
It can talk.
It is glad to see you.
It will give you a great big hug.
Die, puny earthling!

Bellower

Bellower is a young monster that keeps yelling for his mom from the other side of the house.
"Mom! I'm hungry! I want a sandwich!"
It's a really bad habit and hard on the ears.
Maybe one day he will growe out of it.
Or develop a really good tenor singing voice.

The Lizard King

The Lizard King was a jovial fellow.
He loved his fellow monsters and delighted in meeting his subjects.
He was a monster who always had a positive mental attitude.
Right up until the day one of his loyal subjects gave his as a gift the latest CD by Lady Gaga.

Demon

This demon appears inside your bathroom mirror when you least expect it.
It stares into your eyes, snarling and hissing.
Its hands reach out of the mirror.
You hardly have time to feels its claws caress your cheeks...
Before it grabs you and pulls you in!
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

Hammerhead the Second

Hammerhead the Second is the rightful heir of King Hammerhead the First, of the kingdom of Blurtt on the planet Soovlaki.
Many Soovlakians believe that their form of government is not a meritocracy.
Unfortunately Soovlakians have brains the size of peanuts and cannot concentrate for more than four or five seconds straight during the course of a day.
So they go with the flow.
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

Meanie

Meanie is a monster with evil intentions.
He has bad thoughts and mean spirited actions in mind he intends to carry out.
He is up to no good.
Look out!
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

King Hammerhead the First

King Hammerhead the First was accidentally killed by being hit over the head by a falling spiked club forgotten by his son, the ambitious Hammerhead the Second.
The King's ghost emerged from his body and looked around.
It saw what seemed to be a tunnel with a bright light at the end of it.
The ghost decided to go towards the light.
But just before leaving, the ghost looked back and wondered for a moment how that silly spiked club had managed to get there
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

The funny little white robot emerging from the spacetime warp tunnel

I was alone in an open wheat field somewhere in Alberta when suddenly, the air shimmered with a violet hue.
A sparkling sort of warp tunnel opened in front of my eyes and a funny little white robot emerged from the opening.
I had never seen anything like it before and I suppose I never will again, for my civilization in unable to produce such wondrous machines.
Then, to my great surprise, it spoke to me.

Fuzzy Thinker

Fuzzy Thinker is a monster that is confused by our modern times.
Deep down, he yearns for a quieter, slower and more pastoral existence.
But at the same time he is hooked to city life and seeing something new every day.
He'd like to do less for more.
Instead of more for less.

Fast Eddy

Fast Eddy is a monster on the lam from law.
He robbed a bank, spent all the money and now the police are chasing him.
Crime does not pay, Fast Eddy.
It's no use trying to hide out at your mother's house!

Blue Beard

Blue Beard has married twelve times.
He's never needed to divorce any of his unfortunate wives, whose lives were all too brief.
But don't worry ladies.
Blue Beard is convinced he will settle down for good with Lucky Mrs. thirteen!
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

The Master of His Galactic Domain

The Master of His Galactic Domain surveys his subjects with his cold, square-shaped eye.
How to wean them off those silly TV sitcoms that are weakly transmitted through space from a distant blue planet, he wonders?
Perhaps he could destroy Earth from whence the shows are broadcasted?
Or perhaps he could simply start charging a fee to watch them?

Bird

The sinister Bird stood near the old king, staring at him.
The monster watched quietly as his sovereign unsuspectingly drank a glass of apple juice he had poisoned.
Soon, the old king would suffer a brief but agonizing death...
And Bird would rule!
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

The world of monsters

Somewhere underneath the South pole, there is a secret ice cavern containing a lost world, the world of monsters.
Huge dinosaurs live in tropical forests underneath Earth's crust.
During weekdays, the monsters go to school.
On Saturdays they go to the shopping center and on Sundays they go to church.
Guest artist: Jean-Christophe, Benjamin's friend

Bad Day

Bad Day was named thus by his mother because a tree fell on the house the day he was born.
Then the same day, on the way to the hospital, the family car broke down in a storm.
There was a big gust of wind, and his father's wallet fell out of his pocket and all his paper money, a full year's salary, flew away.
Then things got worse.
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

Solaria, the Monster Queen of Light

Solaria, the Monster Queen of Light is a bright lady.
Bright enough to power Detroit with a few solar panels.
Bring your sunglasses when you go to see her.
She's like an eclipse without the moon!

Ant

I don't know about you, but I hate bugs..
If I see a single ant wandering inside the house, I break out three kinds of insecticides and lay a half dozen "ant traps".
Knock, knock.
I wonder who's at the door?
(with guest artist: Pierre Otis)

Unknown

We don't know the name of this monster, or where he's from.
We don't know what he likes to eat or what's on his mind.
We don't speak his language, but we think it might be Romanian.
We don't know which way he's headed, or even if he had a nice time here.
That's why we called him "Unknown".

The Colossus of Tater Ville

The Colossus of Tater Ville one day emerged out of the soil in New Brunswick, Canada, attacking a produce farmer and his tractor.
"Let my tubers grow!" bellowed the monster.
Then the Colossus waved a wooden staff at the potato field, and the soil parted in two.
And all the little potatoes started rolling away in the distance...
Destination unknown.

Treefeet

Treefeet gets very angry when you point at his legs and tell him he has funny-looking feet.
That they look like they are made of wood and are clumsy-looking.
Beware!
Treefeet is the best player on the interplanetary soccer team.
If you provoke him, there is no doubt he will run and catch up with you...
And give you a swift tree kick in the derrière!

Strange Cat

Strange Cat is such an ugly monster...
Even monsteraday.com rejected him five times.
But Strange Cat was persistent.
He kept sending in his cv, and following up on the phone to make sure the people in the monsteraday.com Monster Resources department were aware of his application.
Finally, when there was an opening, he was hired.
And now he is an important part of the team.

Twinkletoes

Twinkletoes is a monster that feels he will become a great ballet dancer.
Pirouettes and arabesques are what he was born to do, he believes.
So when he showed up for his first ballet class...
He was dismayed at his new teacher's pessimism.

Tattooed in the Face

Tattooed in the Face is an asocial monster.
At first glance, most employers would refuse to hire him.
They would judge him an unproductive member of the community,
thereby completely missing his delicate and soft artistic side within.

Zappo

Zappo is a monster that likes to run around, point his plastic handgun at passerbys in the street and yell, "Zap! Zap!"
In truth, Zappo would like to have a real death ray weapon.
One that would vaporize and maim with great efficiency.
Fortunately, those weapons only exist in the secret stashes of the army who are sensible and use them very responsibly.

Izzbut

Izzbut is an immortal space being who's in cosmic showbiz.
He wanders from planet to planet just to bring good cheer and tell a few jokes.
Wherever he goes, people adore his humor.
They go ga-ga over his personality.
When he last visited Earth, he landed on Easter Island.
Now look at all those statue portraits...

Son of Chuckenstein

Son of Chuckenstein was running across a meadow at night.
There was a throng of angry villagers with clubs and pitchforks pursuing him.
The villagers were very angry and had no intention of letting the monster get away.
Son of Chuckenstein thought as he was running for his life that it was like déja vu all over again.

Gre-gorr

Gre-gorr lives in a cave.
High society folks think he's a knave.
Since Gre-gorr declared he will never again shave...
From now until he is in the grave.