The Spirit of Amadeus

The Spirit of Amadeus is seething in the next world.
He has cool new ideas for composing some wonderful new music!
However...
Heaven is full of people with no taste.
The Emperor is there, of course, and yes, he wants a new symphony composed...
But...
He just wants the same old same old.

Chickooglah

Chickooglah comes from a planet where barbecues have been banned.
His kind also frown on tex-mex sauce.
All because some years ago some hungry astronaut explorers landed there...
A dark day no one likes to remember.

Snaggle Face

Snaggle Face won a male beauty contest on his planet.
Everyone voted and decided he was the handsomest of them all.
Of course to them Cary Grant is repulsive.
And Angelina Joli is a horror!

the Green Skull

The Green Skull is on the run!
Hiding out from the super-heroes who want to nab him.
Beware his electro mitt, super fools!
Or the Green Skull will have the last laugh.
Ha, ha!

The Infinity Being

The Infinity Being is stern and not very talkative.
He likes to listen to the blues.
In his opinion, the best singer who ever lived was Etta James.
Bar none.
He also thinks everybody else is wrong and he is right.

Peter Plunder

Peter Plunder joined Weight Watchers last month and lost two pounds.
That’s about one kilogram in metric.
He’s so happy he could give you a great big hug.
That would break you in two.

Elam

Elam detected the intruders in his spaceship, but it was too late.
The shadow beings had united with the mutants...
Who had brought along the sentient robo gladiators...
Who happened to have bloodthirsty friends from the dreaded ninth dimension over...
Elem never had a chance.

Xmas Tree-Zor

My name is Xmas Tree-Zor.
I hunt humans in the forest with an axe.
When they try to run in the snow and stumble...
I laugh ha ha ha ha!

The monster who sells girl guide cookies from door to door

The monster who sells girl guide cookies from door to door is not making a lot of sales.
Nobody seems to be at home.
It seems every hour of the day our monster rings the doorbell is the wrong one.
Some people have a natural talent for calling on you at the wrong moment.

Santa Snake

Santa Snake is delivering the gifts this year.
He swallowed the real Santa whole last July and has completely digested him since then.
Along with another elf last October, he was delicious as well.
Now he wishes you a monstrously happy holiday season!
Oh, and by the way...
Would you happen to know if you taste good?
You seem like a savvy internet surfer to us! Yep, no doubt about it. So why don’t you click here to download this image, to use as a Christmas card that you can attach in an email that you can send to all your friends. Way cool! It’s cheaper than a bunch of stamps! And so much more hip.

Berliozzz

Berliozzz likes to receive the newspaper every morning.
A delivery boy leaves it on his doorstep, rain or shine.
This morning the paper is late.
Berliozzz is impatient to read his comics and horoscope!

The Ignomious Doctor Wong

The Ignomious Doctor Wong built a wondrous machine...
A machine which transforms a human being into an immaterial consciousness...
Immortal!
Invisible!
And yet able to read thoughts...
Why, Dr. Wong is in your room right now...
Inspecting your mind and taking notes!

Skyscraper Head

Suddenly, a massive earthquake shook Manhattan!
What was happening?
It was as though... Yes, the massive buildings were rising in the air!
Then, a monster of colossal proportions rose from the ground...
The skyscrapers tethering on his head!

The Blue Witch

The Blue Witch only throws spells that do good instead of evil.
However, it's kind of hard to decide what is right and wrong.
Plus there are limits to what she can do.
For example, her magic is not strong enough to revive TV shows that have been canceled.

The lady with scary eyes on her ear lobes

Those are not earrings.
That lady has scary eyes on her ear lobes.
They look left and right with an evil glare.
What she sees with them, I don't know.

Bun Bun

Bun Bun is a wily rodent, he placed his money in the stock market.
He bought low and he sold high.
He hung on when it crashed and cashed in big when it rose with a vengeance.
Bun Bun, could you invite me for lunch?

Patrick

Patrick decided to get the same haircut as the actor Robert Pattinson in the movie "Twilight".
It didn't happen.
His hair sproinged up all right, but without the controlled anti-gravity lift look.
Too much art and not enough science perhaps.

Snow covered yeti

This day was cold like a yeti cave...
(guest artist: Nugo11 from Slovenia. See more of his fantastic work here)

The Half Mummy

Imhotep was taking a bath when the high priests decided to mummify him.
“Wait a minute,” he said. “Aren’t you supposed to wait until I am dead before doing that?”
The head high priest replied, “You see it’s this way...”
“We had a union meeting tonight, and it always ends late, so we decided not to wait.”

The Sensitive One

It is not a crime to steal a rose for a pretty girl, said the Sensitive One.
Alas, the pain of unrequited love weighs heavily upon my shoulders.
My fair one has no inkling of my profound feelings for her...
Perhaps I should serenade her window like a troubadour?
Send her chocolates and sweet nothings?
O, wonderful beloved...
If you only knew how true I be for thee.

Kenneth

Kenneth is listening to the frequencies.
He can tune in to the past.
Right now he's listening to a news cast with Dan Rather from 1986.
Kenneth says no matter when he tunes in, it's always bad news.

Big Tonsil

Big Tonsil likes to yell whenever he has a chance.
He does not talk normally, he bellows.
When somebody else tries to say something, he talks about something else as loud as he can.
Wait for your turn to speak, Big Tonsil!

Ike the doormonster

Ike the doormonster is the silent type.
He seems strong and dangerous but inside he is sweet and gentle.
He cries easily when watching romantic movies.
(guest artist: Zarah from Denmark. Meet Ike and all of his friends here)

Flyhorn

My name is Flyhorn and I like to eat in five star restaurants.
I prefer French cuisine, but sometimes I go for vegan as well.
My favorite dish is sautéed autruche à l’orange.
With a nice chablis, mmm-hmmm.
I live a sweet life.

Calvin Claws

Calvin Claws is a handsome fiend.
All the ladies think he smells terrific.
They say no one dresses better than he.
Women swoon at the thought of meeting him.
Who cares if he will rip you to shreds?
He's a celebrity!

Nembutoid

Nembutoid, monster lord of space and time, has returned from his exploration of the eleventh dimension.
He claims there are no clouds there, or sky, or rain.
It is an empty vast space that is very still.
He became frightened of the dark, so he decided to return.

Celery Head

Celery Head is a thinking vegetable creature.
It is green and very healthy for you if you eat it.
Unfortunately you have to catch Celery Head first, which is hard.
It runs real fast, yelling: "Don't eat me! Don't eat me!"

Moon Howler

I am the Moon Howler and I live to scream my head off once a month in the middle of the night.
Ah-wooOOo!
The neighbors don’t appreciate my hobby but I’m hoping one day they will learn to appreciate it.
They have no choice.

Tentacle Tom

Tentacle Tom likes to squeeze the fruit at the supermarket before he buys them.
Sometimes he squeezes too hard and squashes them.
When that happens, the store clerks get sore.
And Tentacle Tom has to pay for the fruit he squashed!

Green Eyes

Green Eyes, you have the sweetest green eyes...
No one in the world is lovelier than you...
When you look at me...
I think I start falling in love with you!
(by Robert with guest artist, Pierre)

Singo

Singo is a monster with quite a lot of spikes.
If fact, Singo has more spikes than any other monster...
Singo is in the Guiness Book ofMonster Records for most spikes.
Singo is proud about it.
And perhaps a little bit vain as well.

The lean, mean, Scream Machine

The lean, mean, Scream Machine is jogging up my street,
Running hard, pumping harder and harder,
It's getting closer...
And closer...
It's just burning up those carbs.

Raven Girl and Inviso-torr

Raven Girl's mysterious friend is Inviso-torr!
She hypnotizes her prey to prepare them for Inviso-torr...
Then Inviso-torr scans the victim's brain...
All the victim's bad habits are revealed...
And removed by Inviso-torr who feeds on them...
Then Raven Girl and Inviso-torr return to the awful place they came from.
And leave behind the victim a better person than before.

Spiky Sam

Spiky Sammy is a warm and cuddly little boy.
How could anyone resist his smile and his blue eyes.
Come to think of it...
He has his mother's eyes!

The Peacock Monster

The Peacock Monster leaves behind him a smear of sticky scarlet pooled.
It is a wonder to look at the motifs on its back...
... And its ravenous maw going snap! snap! snap!
It is not quite a bird of paradise, you see, and it can pursue.
Do not linger close to the Peacock Monster...
... Or there will be no more you!

The Fabulous Quantum Robot

The Fabulous Quantum Robot is formed by small particles which behave statistically.
Each of its atoms breaks down into electrons, protons and neutrons.
And each of those break down into nine kinds of quarks.
And the quarks break down into super strings.
And beyond that no one can guess.

Doodie

If you had to have a monster as a friend, then Doodie would be your best choice.
He's warm! He's helpful!
He has an extra head in his navel!
He has great breath out of both mouths!

The Mental Monster

The Mental Monster is a telepath who can read your thoughts.
No memory can stay hidden from him!
That nice vase you broke without anyone looking?
He's going to tell on you!

The Monster Who Runs Backwards

The Monster Who Runs Backwards is not looking where he is going.
So far, he has hit three telephone poles with the back of his head.
He has also knocked down a little old lady carrying a grocery bag.
Maybe you should wear a helmet with a rear-view mirror, stupid monster!

The Great Grey Sashimi

The Great Grey Sashimi is a monster superhero!
He dashes to the rescue when needed.
He will save the day.
But one day...
He will be swallowed whole by his fearsome enemy, the Sushi Dragon!

The Mad Monk of Montrolia

The Mad Monk of Montrolia loved holy relics and icons.
Their shapes and colors, their sinuous lines.
He loved them so much...
He became one himself.

Honorius

Honorius used to be a regular little boy...
But he was turned into a monster.
This happened when Honorius skipped a day of school, and opened Salomon the magician's black book to read a spell out loud.
You should have stayed in school, Honorius!
Now look at you!

Aretha the Serious Space Armadillo

Aretha the Serious Space Armadillo is a nice monster.
Although 20 feet long and 15 feet high, and with sharp claws, it is not carnivorous.
It can talk, is very well educated, and likes to recite poetry while looking at the distant stars...
Nobody can tell you the soliloquy of the space armadillos like she can.
(guest artist: Joahnne, Benjamin's Mom)

The strange horsie

The strange horsie goes neigh! neigh! neigh!
Even though one wonders where the neighing comes out from.
In fact, it's positively puzzling.
Let's think about it a bit.

Tee Head

Tee Head is a monster that comes from another strange dimension.
The atmosphere there is like chocolate milk in which you poured strawberry jam, and then sprinkled in some cinnamon.
Tee Head is not particularly friendly, nor is he very menacing.
Mostly he is unassuming, waiting for the day when his universe will suck in our own and we will all become his unwitting slaves.

The One-Eyed Weasel

The One-Eyed Weasel cannot be trusted.
He just can't keep a secret.
If you tell him something in confidence...
He'll want so badly to tell everyone what you want to keep mum...
That it will make him go crazy and his head will pop.

The Cat Alien

The Cat Alien has come to our planet to speak to us.
"Meow! Meow! Meow!" he says.
He must have a point.
We only wish we knew what it was.

Louis Light

When you can't see a thing because the dark night is upon you.
On that moment when holding your hand in front of your nose does not register.
At that instant of gloom when your instincts cannot help you.
Just ask Louis Light to show you the way home.

Humongus

Humongus is not a pretty fella.
But at least he doesn't have bad breath.
He doesn't even have a mouth.
Nobody dares make a comment to him about his appearance.
So Humongus thinks he looks like Elvis.

Purple Glower

Purple Glower shines like a star in the night.
Not quite mauve, a bit different than violet.
He hurtles through the cosmos, emanating purple photons.
These particles in turn will orbit the universe, spreading his radiation forever...